The Landau

Not sure how this one popped up in conversation today, but when Tanner and I digress, you never know what sewer you'll end up in. At least this is postable.

I got to thinking about cars and specifically cars from the early 80s, even more specifically American makes. Cars that even though shitty, were bejeweled or embellished with details considered luxurious. It's the manifestations of this type of luxury that I find hilarious.

The concept of luxury as applied to cars began years before with all the chrome found on Deusenbergs, Packards and Cadillacs, then migrated through the 50s with Buicks, Mercurys and Fords. The 60s and 70s led to less chrome and more minimalistic design. Ok, sure, there were some pretty iconic Muscle cars during those years, but most cars were pretty basic. Politics seemed to play more of a role in automotive design back then and it's pretty apparent. The 60s and 70s saw the US battling a failing war, economy and fuel crisis, and gave way to the Reagan years of prosperity and the wildly popular theory of trickle down economics. That and the whole preppy, country club, frat boy, Thurston Howell display of wealth. Let's not forget, the 80s were when Trump began to make his real mark and he's still an icon of classless wealth.

This cultural mindset is what paved the way for such design triumphs like "boot buckles" and the famed Landau top. A prime example was a Cadillac Seville from 1983 that had a hideous sloping trunk and was often adorned with a pseudo spare tire, and if you could swing it, gold belts that were made to invoke a nostalgic homage to the autos of yesteryear, or the desire to be Captain Hook. See exhibit A.



Next was the Landau top. Now, most people are familiar with the cabriolet concept, and like it or not, it is at least fucntional. During the 80s it became en vogue to upholster the rooves of cars to give the impression that they too were cabriolets, but were in reality not. Just hard top cars with canvas rooves. 'What do you mean Simon? Are you telling me that that 1982 Lincoln Town Car isn't a convertible?!?' Puzzling, I know. The one that really gets me though was the Landau. What the hell is that? It's bascically a portion of a vinyl top that covers only the rear portion of the roof. Why? Well, a little research tells us this...

"Usually found on luxury cars, a landau roof enhances the outside appearance by adding an element of formality to a car's roofline. Instead of a full covering of the roof area, a landau roof usually covers the rear section."

Exhibit B



So, it seems the term Landau was actually a historical reference back to coach-building and referred to an open carriage coach, which had a retractble roof, the distinguishing characteristic being the the elegant S shape made by the bars locking in place when closed. Personally, I think it would take a hell of alot more than a Landau to make an '81 Buick Regal look classy, but who am I to judge.

In conclusion, just because there might be history or meaning behind something, that doesn't necessarily make it good. And these cars are oftentimes so hideous, I just cant look away. Plus I love how you can see where this image of regality has worked it's way into current popular culture and the mouths of rappers.